| Joke of the Every Couple of Days!!! | |
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Battlin' Billy - Student  |
Permanent
I'll try to post one joke a day on here. Feel free to add a joke or 2 yourself._______________ Midbie Council Member #2 - Profile ID 2073 | Member of B@rtM@ulS@ar | Owner of Monty's 2000th comment & D@RtHM@UL's 8100th comment | Former Padawan of SilkMonkey & Arcuss JA Goaltender & NHL Fan | Fellow Rush fan to Axion|Plo Koon is my oldest JA friend Post your RL pics HERE! | Post you JK2/JK3 screenies HERE! This post was edited by doobie on Mar 02 2004 04:52pm. |
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Italian Ice - Student 
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What's going on in the car forums? Bentley Forums - - - I used the ash tray today. How do I replace it? Camaro/Firebird Forums - - - My girl slept with my brother and my wife. How can I kill 'em? btw, I have a record and I ain't going back. Mustang (Chevelle) forums - - -Some punk kid in a Civic tried to race me. Monte Carlo forums - - -Why do I keep getting pulled over, it ain't stolen yo. Civic forums - - -Some punk kid in a Mustang tried to race me. VW Bug forum - - - The Save the Earth concert was a success (pics) Yugo Forum - - - When's the last time yours ran? Lamborghini forum - - - Wind noise around 210MPH Miata forums - - - Some redneck jackass in a Chevy Tahoe just ran over my car (pics) Chevy Tahoe forum - - -Miata stuck in my undercarriage. How do I safely remove it? (pics) Pontiac Fiero forum - - - Just bought a new flame retardant suit (pics) BMW 7-series forum - - - Where to get service on my Rolex? Cadillac forum - - - Problems parallel parking at bingo. Chevy Suburban Forum - - - Is the price of gas going down anytime soon? Buick Forum - - - Is Medicare or Medicaid right for me? Delorean forum - - - Just got back from the future and blew a head gasket. Please help. I'm from 1985. Crown Victoria forum - - - How come people never pass me on the highway? Honda Accord forum - - - Mom is giving me the car. Looking for some cheap, used 18 inch rims. Toyota Echo forum - - - Do our cars use AAA or AA's? Ferrari forums - - - Need suggestions about a business trip to Colombia. Want to get in and out fast. Porsche forums - - - Tire just went flat. Is it best to trade or sell the car myself? Saturn forums - - - Roman candle landed on my fender. Melted and need to replace. Jaguar forum - - - Is the carbon fiber dash kit group-buy still on? Mercedes forum - - - My wife and her stink hole lawyer are trying to ruin me in divorce court. How do I get them both killed and not get in trouble with my medical board? Mini forum - - - Just flipped the Cooper after seeing The Italian Job. Suing the movie company. (pics) Dodge Viper forum - - - I frightened myself on the way home from work yesterday. How to get pee stains out of the leather? McLaren F1 forum - - -Some punk kid in a F16 tried to race me. Dodge Minivan forum - - - Where's the best place to post the soccer schedule so I don't forget where I'm supposed to be? Hummer forum - - - Had a fender bender today. 24 hurt, 10 killed. Do I have to get the black touch-up paint from the dealer? He's 25 miles away. That's $35 in gas. Fiat forum - - -Hello? Am I the only member? Subaru WRX forum - - - I hate cops. Got ticketed for drifting in the Walmart parking lot. Chevy pickup forum - - - How do I git the dried tobacco juice stains off the side of mah truck? SRT Forums "Will this void my warranty" RX7 Forums - - - 13B Groupbuy full, stop PM'ing me. DSM Forums - - -Transmission Groupbuy Full stop PM'ing me Supra Forums - - -Head to big to fit in car, should have bought a Targa. Vette Forums - - -Why did I pay $50k for something with a Cavalier steering wheel? Ford 2.3 forums - - -Help! Replaced everything, still doesn't start! _______________ It's funny how many people know they have the right to remain silent, yet never do. |
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Seth C. Belouve - Student 
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Nice!! rotflmfao _______________ Look unto me for I possess the blue flag!! It is more beautiful then I ever imagined! You will now worship me as if I were a god! *smack, dies* I regret nothing, I lived as few men dared dream!! Red Guy from Red Vs. Blue Series |
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Selph Senatu - Student 
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ROFLMAO!!! |
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Urded - Student 
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so once there was a guy who walked into a convent he ask the head nun "mother teresa is there a midget nun in your convent". the nun replies "i dont think there is" the guy looks sad and his freind starts to giggle. then they guys asks the nun "mother teresa is there a midget nun in the state". the nun replies "i dont think there is" the guy looks even sader his freind is laughting really hard. "how about in the country?" asks the guy. "i dont think there is" says mother teresa. by this time the guys freind is rolling on the floor. the guy trying to be hopeful asks "how about in the world". no i dont think so but y do you ask?. the guy on the floor exclames. "Dude i told u that u had sex with a penguin!". _______________ Mapper a la strange. Proud owner of SilkMonkey Award for Wishing He Had Menaxia's Best IRC Smile Award. A Penguin Jedi is Me! |
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JamesF1 - Student 
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ROFL  _______________ Website |
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Shang Chi - Student 
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Did you hear about the redneck who passed away and left his entire estate in trust for his beloved widow? She can't touch it till she's fourteen... _______________ Thirty spokes converge on a single hub, but it is in the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the cart lies. Clay is molded to make a pot, but it is the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the clay pot lies. Cut out doors and windows to make a room, but it is in the spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the room lies. Therefore, Benefit may be derived from something, but it is in nothing that we find usefulness. |
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Cheta T. Must - Student 
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look me 3 rereads to get it, but it was funny |
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Kestral - Student 
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You know if you play too much america's army when you are taking adump and you yell FRAG OUT! _______________ A full fledged Weapon master from where he is from. He is one who wants to learn the way of the Jedi, though he will not give up his love for the weemon!!! |
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SilkMonkey - Distributor of Cold Ones 
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I liked that joke. _______________ |-HK-47 -SilkMonkey: You are receiving a warning for being_too_sexy. If you do not stop, action will be taken against you.|| (11:13:43) � Virtue dances for Silk ||Smiling owner of Smilykrazy's 6000th comment =) ||Odan Wei's Proud Big Brother|| Janus is my official TaruTaru Cuddly Animal Type Person. ||(@Virtue) Or you could just be a man and set fire to your genitals.....you won't fall asleep for days after that.......trust me.||Thomas Skywalker er for sexy for sitt eget beste!!!!| Not changing sig until the JA loosens up. (Started: Aug 31, 2005) |
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ozzcoz - Cosplay Nerd 
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Teeheehee. I like urdeds joke, it is very cunning _______________ A wizard did it. |
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Selph Senatu - Student
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rofl |
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CuZzA - Student 
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Bad Language Poem There once was a guy named Dave, Who dug up a whore from a grave. She was moldy and shitty, And only had one titty But look at the money he saved! _______________ - Even if Carlsberg made "w*nkers", Christiano Ronaldo would still be the biggest "w*nker" in the world |
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Thomasooo - Student 
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/me ruins the post count! ;P _______________ In the navy and LOVING it!
Recipient of comment no. 1000 and heart-warming words from Ataris! 
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Bail Hope of Belouve - Student 
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POST 1337!! _______________ Visit the Belouve Family Website! Quote: I try to have fun with my friends and try to make a difference as best I can. What does making a difference mean? Well, it can be as simple as saying hello, answering a question that seems obvious or heck, just talking. -- Vladarion
Want to know Vladarion? Read the Article about his life here. |
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Garos - Student 
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Hahahahaha! btw, the next post will be number 1337 |
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Shang Chi - Student
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What a Woman says: This place is a mess! C'mon, You and I need to clean up. Your stuff is lying on the floor, and if we don't do laundry right now, you'll have no clothes to wear." What a Man hears: blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON blah, blah, blah, YOU AND I blah, blah, ON THE FLOOR blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES _______________ Thirty spokes converge on a single hub, but it is in the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the cart lies. Clay is molded to make a pot, but it is the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the clay pot lies. Cut out doors and windows to make a room, but it is in the spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the room lies. Therefore, Benefit may be derived from something, but it is in nothing that we find usefulness. |
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Urded - Student 
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got a new one. A wealthy lady decided to go on a photo safari in Africa and took her faithful pet poodle along for company. One day, the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long discovers that he is lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of lunching on him. The poodle thinks, "Oh crap, I'm in deep trouble now!" Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard. I have got to get me another one of those!" Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was a close call. That crazy poodle nearly had me." Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes. The poodle notices him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is now furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine." Now the poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, "Uh-oh...what am I going to do now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet... and just when they get close enough to hear, the poodle says ....................."Where's that monkey? I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another leopard!” I Liked it _______________ Mapper a la strange. Proud owner of SilkMonkey Award for Wishing He Had Menaxia's Best IRC Smile Award. A Penguin Jedi is Me! |
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CuZzA - Student
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_______________ - Even if Carlsberg made "w*nkers", Christiano Ronaldo would still be the biggest "w*nker" in the world |
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SilkMonkey - Distributor of Cold Ones
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Don't make me get started on you Cuzza. I mean you rule...so it'd be hard to get good material. _______________ |-HK-47 -SilkMonkey: You are receiving a warning for being_too_sexy. If you do not stop, action will be taken against you.|| (11:13:43) � Virtue dances for Silk ||Smiling owner of Smilykrazy's 6000th comment =) ||Odan Wei's Proud Big Brother|| Janus is my official TaruTaru Cuddly Animal Type Person. ||(@Virtue) Or you could just be a man and set fire to your genitals.....you won't fall asleep for days after that.......trust me.||Thomas Skywalker er for sexy for sitt eget beste!!!!| Not changing sig until the JA loosens up. (Started: Aug 31, 2005) |
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CuZzA - Student
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Quote: Well that killed the mood...I'm going to now say something that is offensive...to one person. I'm gonna say it cuz its funny. Jacen.Aratan. ouch _______________ - Even if Carlsberg made "w*nkers", Christiano Ronaldo would still be the biggest "w*nker" in the world |
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SilkMonkey - Distributor of Cold Ones
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Someday that'll be you Shang. Someday that'll be you. _______________ |-HK-47 -SilkMonkey: You are receiving a warning for being_too_sexy. If you do not stop, action will be taken against you.|| (11:13:43) � Virtue dances for Silk ||Smiling owner of Smilykrazy's 6000th comment =) ||Odan Wei's Proud Big Brother|| Janus is my official TaruTaru Cuddly Animal Type Person. ||(@Virtue) Or you could just be a man and set fire to your genitals.....you won't fall asleep for days after that.......trust me.||Thomas Skywalker er for sexy for sitt eget beste!!!!| Not changing sig until the JA loosens up. (Started: Aug 31, 2005) |
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Shang Chi - Student
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Dad's dream: To one day have enough money to live the life that the wife and kids do _______________ Thirty spokes converge on a single hub, but it is in the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the cart lies. Clay is molded to make a pot, but it is the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the clay pot lies. Cut out doors and windows to make a room, but it is in the spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the room lies. Therefore, Benefit may be derived from something, but it is in nothing that we find usefulness. |
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SilkMonkey - Distributor of Cold Ones
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Well that killed the mood...I'm going to now say something that is offensive...to one person. I'm gonna say it cuz its funny. Jacen.Aratan. _______________ |-HK-47 -SilkMonkey: You are receiving a warning for being_too_sexy. If you do not stop, action will be taken against you.|| (11:13:43) � Virtue dances for Silk ||Smiling owner of Smilykrazy's 6000th comment =) ||Odan Wei's Proud Big Brother|| Janus is my official TaruTaru Cuddly Animal Type Person. ||(@Virtue) Or you could just be a man and set fire to your genitals.....you won't fall asleep for days after that.......trust me.||Thomas Skywalker er for sexy for sitt eget beste!!!!| Not changing sig until the JA loosens up. (Started: Aug 31, 2005) |
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Jake Kainite - Student 
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Nah mate, blame my terrible english Prolly shouldn't have put a joke or a statement which could be easily misunderstood in the first place  _______________ Apprenctice of Jedi Master Ascari (deceased) Descended from a line of great Jedi Will argue any point of view from any side
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CuZzA - Student 
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my bad _______________ - Even if Carlsberg made "w*nkers", Christiano Ronaldo would still be the biggest "w*nker" in the world |
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